Growing up in the 90s, many of us were unwittingly steeped in a toxic diet culture. From ultra-skinny models gracing the covers of magazines to the relentless promotion of fad diets, hello cabbage soup, Atkins, Slim Fast, etc. The message was clear; thinner is better, and self-worth is tied to appearance. Fast forward to today, and we're now navigating a journey towards self-love and improved body image, unlearning the damaging beliefs of our youth and trying to set up our daughters (and sons) for a more positive and loving body image towards oneself.
The 90s: A Decade of Diet Obsession
The 1990s were filled with diet trends and weight loss fads. From the Atkins diet to fat-free crazes, the era was characterized by an overwhelming focus on weight and size. This was further fueled by media portrayals of beauty, epitomized by the waif-like figures of popular supermodels and celebrities. Even seeing models labeled "Heroin Chic". For many of us growing up during this time, these images and ideas formed the foundation of our understanding of beauty and self-worth.
The Impact on Our Self-Perception
Many of us internalized the belief that we needed to look a certain way to be accepted and valued. This led to a range of issues, from unhealthy eating habits to a distorted body image. The constant comparison with an unrealistic ideal left little room for self-love or appreciation of our unique bodies. Fast forward to our kids scrolling on social media seeing all the celebrities and influencers with their fit figures, airbrushed make up, filters, and cosmetic surgery filled pages.
So how can we help ourselves and our kids?
Let's start by unlearning and relearning in today's environment. Now, in an age that is slowly but surely embracing body positivity and diversity, we find ourselves on a path of unlearning. Social media, while still a double-edged sword, has given rise to movements that celebrate all body types and challenge traditional beauty norms. Some influencers and everyday people alike are advocating for self-love and body acceptance. You have to find the right social media accounts that promote this!
We have to be proactive of who are kids are following and what 'advice" these celebrities and influencers are pushing on them. I try to tell them to NEVER take advice from an influencer that has not gone to school or done any training for nutrition or exercise.
We are all individuals, bio-individuality. What works for one person will not work for everyone!
It is still an almost daily practice I have to do, it's just like learning push ups and getting stronger, you can't do 1 or 2 push ups once a week and expect to get stronger and better and push ups, you can't only run 1 mile once a week and be ready to run a full marathon. Practicing self love and building confidence is a daily practice.
Practical Steps Towards Self-Love
Unlearning decades of toxic conditioning isn't easy, but it's a crucial journey. Here are some steps that can help:
1. Mindful Media Consumption: Be selective about the media you and your kids consume. Follow body-positive influencers and platforms that promote diverse and realistic body images. Easier said then done with the kids, right? Yep. You just gotta keep trying!
Here are some of my favorite accounts - Allison Marketti, Sadie Nardini, Ashley Turner, Lauren Cadilac ( feelgooddietitian), Same Previte (find.food.freedom), Alex Light (alexlight_Idn), Victoria Browne, Callie Gullickson, Dana Mercer Ricci, Erin from rawbeautytalks, Sarah Nicole Landry (thebirdspapaya), Kylie Kelce (kykelce), Abby Langer (langernutrition)
These accounts are very inclusive for everyone and very body positive.
2. Self-Compassion: Practice self-compassion. Speak to yourself with kindness and recognize that self-worth isn't tied to physical appearance. I use a few affirmations daily.
You are worthy
You are kind
You are strong
You are beautiful
Even if on some days I am not feeling it or believe it, I always say them. There is scientific research that this can really help rewire our brain and mood.
3. Health Over Appearance: Focus on health and well-being rather than appearance. This means nurturing your body with balanced nutrition and physical activities that you enjoy. This also means to rest when you need it. This is for our physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health.
4. Celebrate Small Victories: Acknowledge and celebrate small steps in your journey towards self-love. Every positive thought and action counts.
5. Seek Support: Don't hesitate to seek support from friends, family, or professionals, especially if you're struggling with deep-rooted body image issues.
6. Meditate I can not tell you how much mediation has helped improve my confidence and mood. Meditating is a daily activity for me.
7. Breath work and EFT. Both of these can shift your mood and help to rewire your brain.
The journey from internalizing the toxic diet culture of the 90s to helping our kids and ourselves, embrace self-love and a healthy body image is challenging yet deeply rewarding. It's about shifting the narrative from self-critique to self-appreciation, and recognizing that our value extends far beyond our physical appearance. As we continue to unlearn and relearn, let's remember to extend kindness and patience to ourselves, celebrating every step towards embracing our true selves.
What will you do this week to nurture your own self love and confidence?
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